My momma really been on my mind honey. Yesterday Tidal gave me a good play list after telling Alexa to play Sweet Thang by, my mother in my head, Chaka Khan. They played one of my momma’s favorite song “SuperWoman” by Karyn White.

Y’all know that song right?

She talks about giving without reciprocity. In the song she’s being good to man that doesn’t appreciate nor return the same level of care. This doesn’t only happen in romantic relationships either. It happens in friendships, partnerships, work relationships even amongst family members.

When you are the person that looks out often you get looked over.

Why is that?

Why is it so easy to just over look people good to you? I think it’s because we think those people are Super. How would they be able to give or pour out like they do if they needed the same thing as the masses? Where do they find the strength? Most of these Supers can show up in spite of what perils they may be facing in their personal life: ailments, financial stress, child rearing woes, work issues, relationships problems, hell they may just be hungry nevertheless they show!

They know what they give to the world is invaluable and they can’t take it away. But what happens on those days that The SuperMan is simply Clark? Those days he is the shy guy looking at Lois, not the most successful guy at work sometimes he even gets bullied. He feels awkward amongst normal folk. He isn’t as smooth and coordinated. He may even be clumsy a bit. He is human too.

We need to be reminded that about our personal supers. Even the supporters need support. Even the comforters need comfort. The givers sometimes have a need. The cook gets hungry. The listener sometimes needs an ear. The wise may need advice or help gaining clarity. The confident may need encouragement.

But still why do we forget? Supers why dont we ask our loved ones hold space for us? Why do we want to help so much that we don’t want to “burden” others with our “mess”. What does that mean about how we truly see ourselves? Are we not worthy of being poured into? Do we not need a covering because we have that cape? Don’t we matter? Don’t our feelings matter too?

They do! Supers matter.

As amazing as supers are there are moments we return to the “Clark state”. We will be human, just human. Human, which is spectacular in itself, just regular. Having life happen just like the rest of us.

Remember Clark fought some battles that SuperMan couldn’t show up for. Those “real life” moments happen and we don’t always have time to “bust out the shirt” we gotta handle it in our current form. So like humans we sometimes will need reciprocity to keep going or we will crash and burn. Clark would die if he tried to be super before becoming Superman. We will too if we don’t honor and hold space simply as a human.

“Look into the corners of your mind. I’ll always be there for you through good and bad times But I can’t be that superwoman that you want me to be. I’ll give my love oh lasting love if you return to me”

SuperMan has it together, just don’t forget to check on Clark.